Friday Futon - 15 Minutes Into The Future

If I was all rich and famous, and had access to crazy things like that time travel device that Tom Cruise uses, I would probably launch myself about 15 minutes ahead, 15 minutes into the future.

Think of the epic-ness of such a move.  I know, right?!  In the future, I could look back and do all kinds of crazy junk, of course the obvious, make sure that I took the steak off the grill before I burned that $12 dollar filet.  But there are other things too.  Like making sure that killer face melting solo I just ripped on your mom, in her church sunday school class, was in the right key.

Perhaps most important of all however, would be to jump to June 28, 1997.  So, that’s not in the future… so I would have to jump back, then jump forward.  (A lot of technical crap that even you kids who know jQuery real good like, couldn’t comprehend; you’ll just have to take my word for it.)  Anyways, I would go back to the Tyson-Holyfield match and I would be there ringside, yelling at Holyfield that Tyson was gonna chew off his ear.  Now that I think about it, he probably wouldn’t hear me, given the size of the arena and all those crazy ladies cheering for Iron Mike; so this plan likely wouldn’t work.  I’d just be there back in time, but in the future watching Tyson take a bite of Holyfield, and saying to myself: “I knew that was going to happen.”