Where My Friend Bill Dies

• Bill: i tell everybody that i know you, because you're famous
• Me: you tell them that you have my cell number
• Me: and that we txt each other sometimes?
• Bill: oh yeah
• Me: i wouldn't hate you if you sold my number to pay for a hit of crack
• Bill: thank god
• Bill: God
• Me: you still there? or did He strike you down for not capitalizing His name?
• Me: Bill?
• Me: ... Bill?
• Me: dear god
• Me: oh crap